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THE EMPIRE OF JACK:     HOME  :  ALL COLUMNS

Born the son of a circus monkey, Jack had to overcome the stigma of having an address south of the Mason-Dixon Line. Struggling against all odds, he finally got his HS diploma from some guy on the corner, and proceeded to attend NC State University, where his records are now the "running joke" in the admissions office. In February of 2000, he moved to Sydney, Australia, to pursue a writing career full-time. Jack currently has a husband but no wife, no children, and a dog with great fashion sense.

foreign affairs desk
member since 3.30.00
sydney  australia
personal site: www.carter-bradley.com

JACK'S LATEST COLUMN

what have you done for me lately?
9.16.02 : feature!

"Declined."

It was the word that changed everything…the word that I had to accept if I was going to understand what had happened to me.

"Declined."

Such a final word. An insulting word. A demeaning word. It dismisses you without argument, laughing at your self-worth and pointing out your inadequacies.

"Declined."

The word sent me into immediate denial. "Try it again," I coaxed. Beryl was her name. "Try it again, Beryl," I said with a cheerful smile. Some irrational part of my brain argued that if I could charm this toothless, one-eyed harpy behind the counter, then it didn't matter that the machine was saying "Declined" over and over again. I'd just sweet-talk her into accepting my cheerful smile as payment for the petrol and the hotel room. She would just magically forget that I'd just spent the previous ten minutes complaining to her that my mattress was not what I had come to expect from 2 Star Hotels (it had been crudely stuffed wit... 
read on


MOST RECENT COLUMNS

no laughing matter
they don't call them fright wigs for nothing
3.13.02 : feature!
value
having enough for what you need to have
2.22.02 : feature!
how?
one reaction
9.17.01 : feature!
anniversary
a peek inside the sausage factory
5.19.01 : feature!
break with tradition
a tale of travel and teenagers
4.23.01 : feature!
--view all columns--

MOST POPULAR COLUMNS

1. no laughing matter
they don't call them fright wigs for nothing
3.13.02
: feature!
2. culture shock
where women glow, men chunder, and the spiders can kill you
4.26.00 : feature!
3. what have you done for me lately?
9.16.02 : feature!
4. epilogue
fond, fond memories
10.20.00 : feature!
5. how?
one reaction
9.17.01 : feature!
--view all columns--




RAVES

re: what have you done for me lately?

I can't stop laughing. And I think because now I know you, I'm laughing even more.

re: what have you done for me lately?

These just keep getting funnier and funnier. Well, the funny ones, at least.

re: what have you done for me lately?

Excellent! $40 and a dream! I've got to get to Australia.

re: what have you done for me lately?

Clever and engaging and witty. Just like you!

re: no laughing matter

As always, with Jack's writing, this is a keeper!

re: no laughing matter

I laughed a lot at the contridiction of this story and your bio. Perhaps that explains your fear. Maybe...just perhaps....

re: no laughing matter

I can't say I understand the phobia, but, apparently neither can you. Doesn't in the least detract from the column.

re: no laughing matter

Okay Jack, that 'splains why you hang out with this group...aversion therapy reversed.

re: no laughing matter

Scared of clowns or not, that f***ing rocked, Jack.

re: no laughing matter

i think you're great.. you really have a way of not just telling things.. but "showing" things..



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