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FEATURED COLUMNS

mccain v. obama: the final word
please let it be the final word
by joe procopio (@jproco)
topic: pop culture
11.3.08 • CLASSIC

Michael Jordan once said "Republicans buy shoes too." Allow me to add "Democrats don't want to eat babies either." Election day is upon us. Tomorrow, we'll all go out and cast one or more votes one way or the other. As a public service to you, I am proud to offer a comprehensive and inside look at how the other side sees your side by making public the transcript of my sit-down interview with a representative from each. On the right, Chazz Q. Inheritance XIII, leader of the Conservative Republic

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the green-eyed author
dissecting and dodging professional jealousy
by jael mchenry (@JaelMcHenry)
topic: writing
3.4.11 • CLASSIC

Somebody's always getting something you're not. It's the truth of being a writer, and a lot of other artistic professions besides. You start out with nothing, and you create, and if you want to share those creations with a larger audience, you have to make a business out of your art. This is a hell of a process. Sometimes you will succeed and sometimes you will fail. You will taste joy and lose it. You will see opportunities and miss them. You will wish for things and some of those wishes will

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top of the drop
hitting the apex and picking up speed
by adam kraemer (@DryWryBred)
topic: news
8.10.11 • CLASSIC

My father called me the other day.

This, in itself, is not news. We talk a lot. However, it did seem to be a good way to open a column, especially since my next few paragraphs have to do with that conversation. Otherwise, you'd be totally in the dark, and I'd have failed without even getting started. Luckily for both of us that didn't happen.

Anyway, in the course of our conversation, the current political and economic climate came up (we're very intellectual, he and I). My family has traditionally been moderate liberals (some less moderate than others), and we both agreed that the current Republican Party has us appalled. And the current Democratic Party has us mostly disappointed. I mentioned that I had been curious, following last week's debt ceiling debacle and the stock market drop that accompanied it, as to what my least favorite economic talking head, Larry Kudlow, had to say about it.

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tv wrongs and rights
a spring roundup of dolls, teens, and love gods
by michelle von euw
topic: pop culture
4.8.09 • CLASSIC

After watching yet another lackluster episode of “Dollhouse,” a show I've stuck with only because of banked goodwill by Joss Whedon, Eliza Dushku, and anyone even tangentially involved with “Battlestar Galactica” (in this case, Tahmoh Penikett), I suddenly realized why it is destined to fail. We don’t like our dramatic main characters stupid. Sidekicks can be silly. Comedic leads can be goofy, or oblivious, or clueless. Love interests can be vapid, and there’s always the airhead blonde ste

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9021-no
not bad enough to be good
by mike julianelle
topic: television
9.5.08 • CLASSIC

After watching most of the two hour premiere of the new "90210" series, I thought I might write about how this sad attempt at updating the seminal 90s teen soap, by cross-breeding it with "The Hills" and "Gossip Girl," makes a mockery of the original. But halfway through forming that thought, I remembered that the original show was already a mockery. This "90210" captures a bit of the feel of the original, featuring displaced Midwestern (read: innocent and good) kids into a corrupt, debaucherou

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yes, yes, you were bitchin’
now go away
by tracey l. kelley (@TraceyLKelley)
topic: pop culture
11.29.10 • CLASSIC

Friends, an epidemic is sweeping our nation, threatening our moral fiber with false promises, cult of personality, and quirky catchphrases. No, I’m not talking about Sarah Palin. The circumstances are far more heinous than even she could present. The great threat to us now is 80s nostalgia. I am a child of the 80s. I had the bleached-blonde rattail, the multiple ear piercings, and the linebacker shoulder pads. With a delicate balance, my musical tastes switched between the grand despair of M

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an interview with charles burnett
talking with an african-american cinema icon
by jason gilmore (@JasonGilmore77)
topic: film
4.11.08 • CLASSIC

1988 MacArthur "Genius" Grant recipient Charles Burnett was born in 1944 and raised in Los Angeles. While a student at UCLA Film School, he directed the masterpiece Killer of Sheep (1977), which details a poor, black South Central L.A. man's emotional struggles in the face of his brutal day job. The film was later named one of the "100 Most Influential Films of All Time" by the National Society of Film Critics and was selected for preservation by the Library of Congress. Despite the obstacles

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the men who stare at boobs
an open letter to ty mcdowell
by jeffrey d. walker
topic: news
4.14.10 • CLASSIC

Dear Ms. McDowell: First off, forgive me for not sending this letter via traditional methods. Despite my efforts, I was unable to find your contact information. So, I am using the most public forum I have access to in the hopes this message reaches you. Second, forgive me for jumping straight in with a pun, but I have been keeping abreast of the news reports regarding the march that took place on April third, dubbed "Portland's First Ever Female-Bodied and Allied Topless Adventure" by thewest

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well you didn't tell me that, now did you?
things learned about traveling while traveling
by maigen thomas (@Maigen)
topic: humor
10.26.09 • CLASSIC

Despite having been a flight attendant for the last year and a half, I've never been as intrepid as I may seem. At work, I'm always on someone else's schedule. After sleeping off the jet lag, I seem to find myself with barely enough time to find a souvenir, then I'm in the air again. I've never gone off on my own, never traveled without a safety net of family or boyfriend, never explored the unknown. I'm a creature of comforts when at home: I order the same dish from restaurants because it's

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conqueror, thy name is apple
how i got an i-life
by alex b (@Lexistential)
topic: tech
5.25.07 • CLASSIC

I am hooked on Apple. No day goes by without quality time spent with my iMac and iPod; I can’t picture a day where I don’t spend some time tinkering with an iTunes playlist or listening to a podcast. But I didn’t consciously know how much of a habitual iNerd I was till I downloaded an iTunes upgrade. The page greeted me boldly with an 18-point font: “Welcome to the entertainment center of your world.” At that, I thought, "YES." My computer and iPod are indeed the gatekeepers of my entertain

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the way we read now
amazon's kindle, and the present and future of the digital book.
by sarah ficke (@DameMystery)
topic: tech
11.30.07 • CLASSIC

On my nineteenth birthday, I fell in love with a book. The moment my fingers touched the supple, green leather cover, worn soft and smooth from age, I knew that I had to own it, so much so that I told my dad that he could send back whatever present he had bought for me because this was it - the only thing I wanted. The content of the book (it happened to be The Three Musketeers by Alexandre Dumas) was almost immaterial. The book itself was my object, and it remains one of my most prized possessi

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the coulter report
the original pseudo-conservative
by erik lars myers (@TopFermented)
topic: pop culture
2.18.08 • CLASSIC

Coulter is the legal correspondent for Human Events and writes a popular syndicated column for Universal Press Syndicate. She is a frequent guest on many TV shows, including Hannity and Colmes, Wolf Blitzer Reports, At Large With Geraldo Rivera, Scarborough Country, HBO's Real Time with Bill Maher, The O'Reilly Factor, Good Morning America and has been profiled in numerous publications, including TV Guide, the Guardian (UK), the New York Observer, National Journal, Harper's Bazaar, and Elle maga

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constant craving
*the secret* to success
by heather m. millen
topic: humor
8.27.08 • CLASSIC

The other day I was sitting at my desk. It was about 4:00 in the afternoon, the day had been a bit stressful and I was greatly in need of a tiny token of relief. Suddenly, I realized that all my soul craved was a cookie. I don't eat cookies very often but who am I to judge what my soul desires? My husband happened to call and I said aloud and with conviction: "I really want a cookie." Ask. Cookies are good. I used to make cookies with my grandmother. She made these amazing little thumbp

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longhair tv
by jeff miller (@jmillerboston)
topic: pop culture
2.24.10 • CLASSIC

My hair used to be REALLY long. Cliff Burton long. Conan the Barbarian long. Born-in-the70's-hit-puberty-in-the-80's long. There was nothing ironic or unusual about this. In my day - and at a burly 38, I feel entitled to an occasional in my day - if you were a young man who knew how to rock and roll all night and party every day, this was barely a choice at all. Growing your hair was as much a conscious decision as wearing jeans or eating fast food. It wasn't a question of should I grow it out

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RECENT COMMENTS

re: irrussistible
I am not going to read it this time. I do and I just cannot pull myself together to comment. It is a beautiful tribute. I am very glad that you wro...

re: guns don't kill people....
Can we please find a way to heal and protect? I NEWTOWN, Conn. (AP) — A man opened fire Friday inside two classrooms at the Connecticut elementary sc...

re: a year without netflix
I would expect that and especially Netflix. Marketing, baby. They're spending zillions to get new subscribers....

re: everybody poops
What a bunch of crap! :-D Sorry. I tried to let it pass. Butt I'm weak. [edited]...

re: you are on your own heroes journey
Too short. Sigh. Thanks Maigen. I just miss him. I am glad that I can find people who cared deeply for him here. He had such good friends here!...





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