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get rich quick
invest in you, inc.
by joe procopio (@jproco)
topic: news
12.1.08 • CLASSIC

HOLY CRAP! I MEAN SWEET MOTHER OF BETTY AND HER MORE FISCALLY CONSERVATIVE SISTER WHO LORDS OVER ALL THAT FURNISHES MY HOME AND IS PART OF A WELL-BALANCED BREAKFAST AND HOLY CRIPPITY CRAP! There. I did it. I opened all my 401K statements. People come to me all the time for advisement in one discipline or another. I find this ironic, what with my attitude, my track record, and my haircut, but nonetheless I'm here for you. Call it losing a philosophical life-bet. Plus I'm pretty good at a lot of

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books are not babies
part i: approaching the launch
by jael mchenry (@JaelMcHenry)
topic: writing
4.4.12 • CLASSIC

In many ways, we writers feel like our books are our children -- we created them, we're protective of them, and somehow they infuriate us even as we love them to pieces. A quick search for "my books are my children" instantly delivers 140,000 results, and author blogs like Book Pregnant draw the parallel in detail.

And yet. There are some important differences, right?

Last April I had the wonderful adventure of seeing my first book come out into the world, and this April, I'll have an even more amazing adventure when my first baby does the same. I know enough to know that I can't possibly understand how much having a child will change my life. But I've observed some differences so far in preparing for the baby's arrival and the book's, so I can certainly share five ways in which the two things are worlds apart at this stage:

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just a minute!
with all this time-saving technology, why do i feel like i'm always falling behind?
by adam kraemer (@DryWryBred)
topic: tech
8.17.07 • CLASSIC

I have a friend, who shall remain nameless, whose boyfriend is constantly complaining to her that he doesn't have enough time to do anything. He doesn't have enough time to do his homework for grad school. He doesn't have enough time to talk to her for more than 15 minutes a day (they live about three hours apart). He doesn't have enough time to relax at all. Except that he spends four or five nights a week at the bar with his buddies. Yeah, my friend's boyfriend is a douchebag. I only mentio

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baby without the maybe
awake in the present moment of pregnancy
by michelle von euw
topic: general
7.12.10 • CLASSIC

I won’t be pregnant forever. This thought turns itself over in my head as I lie awake at some way too early hour, experiencing the insomnia that has been yet another symptom to add to a growing list. As the months ahead of me that have been carefully measured turn to weeks, to days, what this statement means has changed significantly, too. At first, it was a forbidden thought: I was so terrified during my first trimester, so scared that something would go wrong, that I barely allowed myself t

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bleat the parents
judgment fray
by mike julianelle
topic: humor
12.22.10 • CLASSIC

We’ve known each other a while now. We don’t always see eye to eye, but despite our differences, I think we can all agree on two things: 1 – I’m a pretty amazing person, all around. 2 – I can’t remember the second thing. My actions, behavior, personality and general comportment on a daily basis are completely and 100% irreproachable. As such, there’s no reason to bother judging me; there’s nothing to judge. Besides, you don’t see me judging you, do you? Sure, most of you like terrible music

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writing in polka dots and plaid
taking inspiration from project runway
by tracey l. kelley (@TraceyLKelley)
topic: television
10.27.10 • CLASSIC

NOTE: If you have not watched any of "Project Runway" Season 8, know this column contains spoilers. Come back and read it after you've watched the finale! I totally suck at sewing. Oh sure, I can reattach a button and quick stitch a small tear. But that is, quite simply, the range of my needle and thread abilities. I don't know how to work a sewing machine. I don't crochet. I don't knit. It's embarrassing to admit how many pieces of clothing I've given to my mother-in-law for repair. My siste

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jason point
the ups and downs of creating an amusement park in your front yard
by jason gilmore (@JasonGilmore77)
topic: humor
9.14.09 • CLASSIC

As a child, I adored Cedar Point, our local amusement park, and eagerly awaited my trip there each summer. I could think of no better place in the world. On the way there, I aggravated my parents the entire hour-long drive from Toledo to Sandusky. “Are we there yet?” I asked, every ten seconds. “Are we there yet? Are we there yet?” Once inside the park, I floated, transfixed by its exhilarating rides and kaleidoscopic arcades, by the soft cotton candy that warmed in my mouth on the way to t

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from such great heights, come down
the fall into reality continues
by jeffrey d. walker
topic: pop culture
12.14.11 • CLASSIC

This is going to sound like complaining. But, it also could be the documenting of my mental collapse. So, enjoy.

In August, I wrote a piece called If you’re an artist, when is enough enough? Therein, I lamented about my urge to continue to make music, when I most certainly was not doing so. And now, four more months have passed; or, 1/3 of a year. And I am equally nowhere in terms of music creation. What has happened?

The easy answer is: it's hard to keep producing music without a band. Time has taught me that pretty much any music I write is improved through the benefit of collaboration. The best songs I've been a part of are pieces that started as a few notes plucked during a band practice that was latched onto immediately by someone else in the room, shouting, "play that again - I got something."

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this earth day, make the world a better place
and not just with your gorgeous smile!
by maigen thomas (@Maigen)
topic: pop culture
4.22.09 • CLASSIC

"Another day, another dollar." Or, perhaps you've heard, bitterly and far more appropriate to the current economic situation: "Same shit, different day." It's always a cycle for us, whether we be creative types or worker bees in cubicle farms, however exciting life can be one day, it's usually back to normal the next. Or, whatever the closest approximation to 'normal' can be. Unfortunately, the same logic can't be applied to the planet we call home. "Another day...same earth" just doesn't h

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the x in orthorexic
a foodie declares war on a health food junkie's disease
by alex b (@Lexistential)
topic: general
4.16.08 • CLASSIC

When a food-related disorder has an X in its spelling, the letter seems to make the condition just a little more dire. In orthorexia, X specifically marks a paranoid spot in a health-food junkie's worst nightmare. Wait a second, you say. Orthorexia? What? An obsessive condition not yet listed as a malady in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual, orthorexia nervosa is an affliction with numerous followers nonetheless. Unlike anorexics who pursue perfection by depriving themselves of any food,

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a part of our speech
by sarah ficke (@DameMystery)
topic: news
4.16.12 • CLASSIC

Loving: Noun
Loving begins as a noun, but not just any noun. Loving is a personal noun; it is something we experience only through the prism of ourselves. We can’t point to the source of love, diagram its location, or dissect it from our body, and yet it is there. Loving is also a noun in the stricter sense: Richard Loving, a white man born in Caroline County, Virginia, in 1933.

Loving: Verb
Loving may begin as a noun, but we know it best as a verb. We recognize love only because we see it in action: caring, sharing, laughing, kissing, touching, soothing, healing, helping, grieving. These actions can shape our lives, yet we can’t trace them to a source. Love – of nature, of creatures, of music – is a mystery in the abstract, but vibrant in reality. Something happens in your spirit, your physical heart might thump, your nerves might jitter, and suddenly that potential for love comes out into the open. That kind of spark caught Richard Loving (noun: white) and Mildred Jeter (noun: black) and whirled them into action. They were loving each other, and – as it always does – that love was shaping their lives.

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words, words, words
how you keep where you keep them
by erik lars myers (@TopFermented)
topic: tech
7.16.07 • CLASSIC

When I was a little kid, maybe 6 or 7 years old, I taught myself the Dewey Decimal System and spent an enormous amount of time cataloging every book in my house. It was probably a day, but in my memory it seems like weeks. To what was most likely the abject horror of my parents, I cut out little slips of paper, wrote the DDC number on each one and taped them to the spine of the book with scotch tape to create my own library. 25 years later, I still have books with these tags taped on the si

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who moved my chi?
finding my way back to inner peace
by heather m. millen
topic: general
4.23.08 • CLASSIC

I'm an incredibly organized person. I keep an "Infamous To Do List" that is updated daily and nothing gives me greater pleasure than checking off items. I like clean surfaces and carefully arranged closets. Clothes belong in a chest of drawers, not the floor of my bedroom. I have boxes and drawers and baskets, all to better organize my life... and my husband's life if he would only listen to me and STOP LEAVING ALL THAT CRAP ON THE DESK! When something is lost in the house, it's inevitably

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the elevator superhero
captain america goes to portland
by jeff miller (@jmillerboston)
topic: pop culture
4.20.12 • CLASSIC

The morning we're leaving for our family trip to Portland, Maine, my son discovers one of the hiding places where I've (obviously) failed to conceal an open Amazon box containing two kick ass 10" Marvel action figures. Through the open cardboard flap, he spies a Captain America shield, barely visible through the packaging - but it's enough to send him flying down the stairs yelling "DADDY DADDY I SEE CAPTUM ANMERICA CAN I HAVE HIM!?

He's three this month, and there's just no postponing gratification - birthday or not - when a toy of this caliber is unearthed. If he'd dug a little deeper, he would've seen the brain-melting awesomeness of the accompanying Iron Man figure. Luckily, I get to save that one for his big day.

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re: irrussistible
I am not going to read it this time. I do and I just cannot pull myself together to comment. It is a beautiful tribute. I am very glad that you wro...

re: guns don't kill people....
Can we please find a way to heal and protect? I NEWTOWN, Conn. (AP) — A man opened fire Friday inside two classrooms at the Connecticut elementary sc...

re: a year without netflix
I would expect that and especially Netflix. Marketing, baby. They're spending zillions to get new subscribers....

re: everybody poops
What a bunch of crap! :-D Sorry. I tried to let it pass. Butt I'm weak. [edited]...

re: you are on your own heroes journey
Too short. Sigh. Thanks Maigen. I just miss him. I am glad that I can find people who cared deeply for him here. He had such good friends here!...


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