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what i stand for
when i'm not sitting
by robert a. melos
10.7.02
humor


Having posted articles here at Intrepid Media since March of 2002, a whopping 8 months, and having gone back and reread my works, I realize there is no definitive me in my eclectic works. Sure there are a lot of different parts of me, but none that can be taken as the whole me.

It's not like I'm a guy setting out to change the world, because I'm much to self-centered to care enough to change the world, as long as everything is going okay for me I'm happy. I like to leave world changing up to the politicians, so I can always have someone to blame later when it doesn't suit my immediate needs. Besides changing the world is a big job, and not one I feel like taking on at the moment.

The problem is, I'm not content to just carve out my own little niche and live out the rest of my existence there either. Oh I suppose for some that would be enough of an accomplishment in life, but I feel like I want something more. Sure, if all I do is carve out a niche and exist for the rest of my life, I'll be happy with that achievement. I just know that isn't for me.

Many of my articles center on gay issues, but this isn't surprising since I'm a gay man. I'm one of those writers who tends to take everything in his life and make it into something to write about, like morning coffee and jam while watching the news. Of course that would be if I actually got up in the mornings, drank coffee, or watched the news.

So writing about being gay, or more precisely how I saw things during my coming out process, is where I was in my life when I stumbled upon Intrepid Media. Apropos of nothing, I happened to stumble upon an article about the fear of clowns, by Jack Bradley, which intrigued me. More intriguing than Jack's frighteningly hilarious article was the forum at which it was posted.

As a writer I was hooked. While that may be how I ended up Intrepidizing myself, it literally has very little to do with what I stand for, what makes me the me who writes his life as an offering to the literary gods in hopes of redemption for some heretofore unrealized sins. I never thought of myself as the type of guy trying to fit in, because of my upbringing and childhood traumas, so I can't in good conscious say I'm just taking my place in society making my useful contributions through my written words.

Besides, standing for something implies taking a stance on some position or other, which I do. However, most of the issues I've taken stances on are gay issues which are important to me in my self definition of who I am, but those issues don't clearly define me in an over all sense. I like to think I'm more than just an incredible hot gay guy, and I know I'm more than a one-trick pony, but when I began to think about what it is I actually stand for, I was at a loss.

I believe in love, freedom, truth, and beauty, free enterprise, Martha Stewart's right to sell her stock whenever she pleases, cute shirtless guys on hot summer days, loyalty to a cause as long as it doesn't conflict with my own personal code of ethics which is much too complicated to go into now, and ice cream.

I'd like to say I stand for America, the flag, and mom's apple pie, but my mother's apple pie making skills leaves something to be desired. She does make a fantastic carrot cake, however carrot cake isn't as All-American as apple pie. Oh well, two outta three ain't bad.


ABOUT ROBERT A. MELOS

Robert is the author of the novels Cool Mint Blue, Melba Ridge, and the recently released The Adventures of Homosexual Man and Lesbian Lad; and the creator of the on-line comix Impure Thoughts found at his web site Inside R.A. Melos, as well as having been an on-line staff writer for QBliss where he had a monthly humor column, Maybe A Yip, Maybe A Yap. In his non-writing time, when he's not studying the metaphysical or creating a tarot deck, he sells real estate in Middlesex County New Jersey, hangs out with his dog Zeus, and spends time at the Pride Center of New Jersey in Highland Park, NJ, where he is on the Board of Trustees.

more about robert a. melos

IF YOU LIKED THIS COLUMN...

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