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valentine's day massacred
why the heck does this holiday bug me so much?
by adam kraemer (@DryWryBred)

Well, it seems to be that time of year again (no, not that time of year; the other one. On the left). Of course I'm talking about Valentine's Day, the soul sucking, Hallmark hallmark of love and/or bitterness, planted deviously between Christmas and Easter (or perhaps even more deviously between Groundhog Day and President's Day). As you might have already guessed, Valentine's Day kinda annoys me. Not only because I'm pretty much always alone for it, but, more importantly, because no one had the foresight to plan it so that the damned holiday always falls on a weekend. I think I'd like it a lot more if every year I could get drunk, forget my troubles, and sleep late the next day. Like the night before Easter.

But I do get the feeling that I'm not alone in my dislike of V.D. (yeah, it's an old joke, but tried and true). Obviously single people don't like it; that nearly goes without saying. It's my guess that there are many guys out there in wonderful relationships who also feel that Valentine's Day is somewhat fecal in nature, due to the pressure to get the right gift and pick the right restaurant and act 100% perfect. The only people who really like the holiday are a) greeting card, chocolate, and jewelry manufacturers, b) women who know they're going to get one or more from choice (a), and c) those elementary school kids whose teacher makes everyone bring in enough cards for the whole class, so that none of her eight-year-olds will have to feel the emotional pain of Valentine's Day until they're older and can handle the bitterness of rejection and the black biliousness of loneliness.

Or something slightly less poetic.

But in an effort not to just reflexively bash Valentine's Day as one of the current unlucky, I sat down and thought hard about what really bothered me about a day supposedly dedicated to love and the pure enjoyment of having someone with whom to share one's life. I admit to being cynical when it comes to human nature and this sort of thing, but I am a romantic at heart, and therefore it puzzled me even more that I just never felt as though Valentine's Day was really a special celebration.

I think my first problem is the mandatory gift giving. I mean, seriously, which is more special, a gift given that is not only expected, but actually essentially demanded, or a gift given that is surprising and thoughtful? Obviously the latter (unless it's surprising in a bad way, like a wake-up enema or something).

Seriously, though - when a present is expected, its worth and romanciness (it's a new word, dammit) diminish, at least a little. That's not to say that I don't enjoy getting birthday gifts or Chanukah gifts - everyone enjoys getting gifts - but how romantic can a gift given out of fear of retribution be? Yes, sure, Valentine's Day gifts are also often given out of love, but just imagine the most likely reaction to, "Oh, jeez, honey, it totally slipped my mind. Well, there's always Presidents Day." Again, I say, the gift giving is at least partially due to fear of retribution, humiliation, and/or castration (sounds like marriage, some might say, but without the occasional sex).

So given that the gifts aren't special surprises, and usually fall into the "stock gifts" category, what criteria does one use to determine the value of a gift? Why, its value, of course. Sure, a teddy bear holding a heart is precious, but not nearly as precious as a new diamond tennis bracelet - or so those in charge of the commercialization of Valentine's Day would have you believe. Why give chocolates when you can give jewelry? Well, for one thing, if you're like me, you can't afford jewelry. Hell, if you're like me, chocolate can sometimes be a stretch.

Which brings me to my second problem with the darn day - commercialization of love. I suppose it's not surprising; if the powers that be can turn Jesus' birthday into an excuse to put up gaudy light displays, spend half your year's pay on your children, and walk extra-slowly in front of me down Fifth Avenue, they can certainly convince you that your relationship is in trouble if you don't prove it monetarily in the middle of February.

And while I'm all for tradition, and recognize that candy and flowers and jewelry are very romantic, it occurs to me that maybe there should be better gifts to give a loved one to show your thoughtfulness than some run of the mill, holiday-specific crap they sell at CVS. But, no, these specific things have been defined as "romantic" in lieu of other, more useful, gifts. A magazine subscription is not romantic. A new hairdryer is not romantic. Hiring a professional killer to whack the guy who stood her up for the prom is a little romantic, but really more of a Presidents Day thing.

Of course the biggest problem with Valentine's Day is that it really has become a day that makes single people feel especially bad about themselves. My friend Amanda says that back when she was single she used to wear black just out of protest. Given, now that she lives in New York City where black is pretty much the required uniform, you wouldn't be able to tell that she was protesting, but at least the intent would be there.

I suppose from the point of view of a single guy, there is something to be said for a holiday that encourages desperate single women to get drunk and do stupid things (unless she and her friends have formed one of those one-night man-bashing cults, and then, my friend, you want to stay the hell away from that table at the bar). It's just that most single people probably stop and think, "Damn. Still single," at least once a day anyway. Why go and sanctify a day that does such a wonderful job of reminding we unfortunates about our current lot in life? Why not create a holiday celebrating being rich, so that poor people feel extra-bad? Or a holiday based on I.Q. that excludes the stupid? Just picture the greeting cards: "Roses are red; violets are blue. This is your day because you're not some dumb bastard."

The problem with all of this protest against Valentine's Day, though, is that deep down I'm really just jealous. I want to be the guy buying flowers for his sweetie. I want to be the one walking hand-in-hand down the sidewalk, getting dirty looks from guys whose shoes I used to be in (metaphorically speaking, of course; those guys have terrible taste in footwear). I want to go out to dinner and have everyone envy me. And I want a pony.

In other words, while I don't disagree with my above points, I'm willing to come clean about being a hypocrite. And I think a lot of single people probably feel the same way I do: we blast Valentine's Day for making us feel bad about ourselves, but secretly we're just envious that we don't get to celebrate as though we were members of the non-single community (I hear they get the good parking spaces).

During my tenure in journalism school, one of my classes had the opportunity to interview Dr. Xavier Amador, a psychologist at Columbia Presbyterian who had written a book called something like, "Being Happily Single in a Couples World." It was all about things the single person could enjoy in life even without a partner. However, I thought that it was somewhat telling that during his time writing the book, the esteemed doctor actually met someone and got married. So much for being happily single.

I know I've written enough on this site about how crappily single I am that it could fill a book of its own (albeit a small one). So this time around, instead of complaining about it, I want to ask the non-single people reading my column to do me a favor. Please, please, please look at your significant other and appreciate what you have. I know that being in a relationship comes with its own set of problems, trust me. But there's something honestly wonderful about having someone in whom you can confide, someone you can turn to when you're happy or sad or horny, someone who loves you just because of the person you are. Not all relationships are good; I know that. But if yours is one of the good ones, please don't take it for granted. My roommate suggests regaling your partner with long, romantic speeches like those in Tom Hanks movies.

And especially not just on Valentine's Day, I should add. Make sure that every now and then, you pick a random day to let your wife/husband/girlfriend/boyfriend/mistress/cellmate know how important he/she/it is in your life. Because, as I said earlier, it's often so much more delightful to get a gift when you're not expecting one (unless, of course, the surprise "gift" shows up on your doorstep one morning with a note pinned to the basket that says, "Guess what, Daddy!").

You might have noted throughout that I've claimed that Valentine's Day is simply about making single people go psychotic. That's not really true; it should also serve as a reminder to all of you out there in relationships: if you've got a good thing going, don't screw it up. As I said, I'm at ease with my hypocrisy; as much as Valentine's Day bugs me and as much as the card companies and corporations try to bastardize it into some cheap marketing ploy, I know it's ultimately a celebration of love and caring and affection, and in the final analysis, how can that be wrong?

Dammit. I really wanted to be bitter this year.


A native of Elkins Park, PA, Adam Kraemer spends way too much of his time repeating "K-R-A-E..." He moved to New York City in 1998 and earned Master's in Journalism at NYU; don't let his writing fool you. He feels he is best known for saying the things no one is thinking, but afterwards wish they had been. He spends his free time wondering where all his free time goes and why he can never come up with a decent kicker for the ends of his articles.

more about adam kraemer


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matt morin
2.6.02 @ 12:33a

I've never had a date for Valentine's Day. So the past 4 years here's what I did so that I didn't purposely blind myself with rose thorns:

I bought a rose for every woman in my office. Sometimes it's 15 roses. Sometimes it's four dozen. But everyone gets one.

You would be amazed at the reaction. Women who are single and don't get anything have cried. And everyone is incredibly appreciative. I felt like a V-Day Santa Claus. It made the day so much fun.

You don't have to spend a lot of money either. I'm sure you'd get similar reactions if you gave every woman a personalized Scooby-Doo valentine, too.

jack bradley
2.6.02 @ 5:31a

The above comment makes me very glad that I work at home. Alone.

That being said, I always make a big night out of it with my partner...we treat it like an anniversary, of sorts. "This is our 3rd Valentines" or whatever year it is...it's like a landmark for us.

Oh, and Adam? I like you better when you're bitter. (I'm saying this in the hopes of letting you know that I appreciate you...even if it isn't V.Day, yet.)

adam kraemer
2.6.02 @ 7:35a

Thanks, Jack. You don't bring me flowers anymore.

For what it's worth, I am a big fan of both V.J. and V.E. Days.

tracey kelley
2.6.02 @ 9:27a

Awww, Matt, what a sweet thing. You're right = most would also appreciate the Scooby Doo valentine, too.

My guy and I usually don't give anything for Valentine's Day because:
1) My birthday is so close to it.
2) There are only so many stuffed teddy bears you can give.

So we usually plan on skipping off for a weekend together sometime in the month of February so we can do something special and different. This year we'll drive to Omaha and goof around for a couple of days.

Yeah, I know. But when you live in Des Moines, Omaha is Shangra-la.

adam kraemer
2.6.02 @ 10:08a

So what does that make Shangra-la? It's all about the insurance, isn't it?

jill farbman
2.6.02 @ 10:37a

Terrific column Adam! Valentines always gave me a head cold (until this year, awe shucks). I'm still wondering what that means.

mike julianelle
2.6.02 @ 10:42a

Magazine subscriptions can be romantic. Question: Does the fact that a letter to a sweetheart is typed on a computer and not handwritten dilute its romanciness (nice word)?

adam kraemer
2.6.02 @ 10:57a

Jill - I think it means either a) that you were never engaged before or b) that you still have a week to get a head cold.

Mike - I'll let the women handle that one, though I expect that with my handwriting, a typewritten confession of love might even be more romantic.

tracey kelley
2.6.02 @ 11:15a

Nope. I'd rather have a hand-written one, regardless of how bad the handwriting is. Handwritten notes, cards, letters and so on never lose effectiveness or sincerity.

Adam, if I got hot over insurance, I'd stay in DSM. Next to Hartford, we're it as far as insurance goes. Wa-hoo.

russ carr
2.6.02 @ 11:16a

Magazine subscriptions can be romantic.

Nothing says "I love you," more than a subscription to The Sporting News.

adam kraemer
2.6.02 @ 11:19a

I'd rather just have someone who remembers to close their html tags.

adam kraemer
2.6.02 @ 11:27a

Okay, so what's so special about a hand-written card? The language doesn't change. What about a choice between handwritten and Hallmark?

mike julianelle
2.6.02 @ 11:35a

I just think a typed letter or something is so impersonal and distant and cold. I've done it. It's funny in retrospect, but it is pretty ridiculous if you ask me.

jael mchenry
2.6.02 @ 11:42a

Hey, Emails are typed, and they can be very romantic and/or sweet. I don't think handwriting is anything special. If he means it, he means it, and what does it matter whether it's cursive or print, serif or sans?

mike julianelle
2.6.02 @ 11:50a

Why does it have to be a he?

adam kraemer
2.6.02 @ 11:53a

Because women only write love notes when it's unrequited. It's in all the classic novels.

roger striffler
2.6.02 @ 12:02p

If you're reading e-mail, you've already subconciously resigned yourself to typed text. The content can still be very sweet, or kind, or angry...but you never consider for a moment that it might not be typed.

I find that a hand-written letter, on any topic, not just romance, is more personal. Typing is fast and easy - actual writing, with a pen or pencil, takes time and effort. It's also identifies the sender...anyone can type a message and put someone's name at the end. (I'm not being paranoid, I just think the handwriting makes the message more uniquely part of the sender).

Handwritten notes/letters win.

roger striffler
2.6.02 @ 12:03p

That said, I tend to type rather than write. It's faster and easier.


adam kraemer
2.6.02 @ 12:20p

Yeah, but we hypocrites have to stick together.

I would imagine that the stationery companies took a big hit with the advent of e-mail.

tracey kelley
2.6.02 @ 12:26p

Hallmark took a big hit, too, because people started sending e-cards. Hallmark initially charged for e-cards, then realized that wasn't going to work, so now you can send free official Hallmark e-cards, too.

Roger's got it. The time and thought involved with handwritten stuff makes the receiver feel a little more special.

jael mchenry
2.6.02 @ 12:29p

Mike, it has to be a he because I wrote it and I don't want romantic letters, handwritten or otherwise, from women. You heard it here first.

adam kraemer
2.6.02 @ 12:36p

You're saying you wouldn't be touched by a flowery heart-felt missive from, say, Ellen?

tracey kelley
2.6.02 @ 12:36p

Jael - smoochie booches.

jael mchenry
2.6.02 @ 12:39p

Okay, if it's Tracey, that's different. ;)

tracey kelley
2.6.02 @ 12:40p

You know who your food mama is, don't you kitten? :)

russ carr
2.6.02 @ 12:42p

First jello wrestling, now this?


jill farbman
2.6.02 @ 12:44p

I think I'm coming down with something.

adam kraemer
2.6.02 @ 12:52p

I warned ya.

jael mchenry
2.6.02 @ 12:57p

Tracey: you're my food mama.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled glibfest.

adam kraemer
2.6.02 @ 1:01p

Or, in this case, glibfeast.

matt morin
2.6.02 @ 1:17p

Nothing says "I love you" like a little handwritten note. Especially if the words on the note say, "I love you."

jael mchenry
2.6.02 @ 1:35p

That's almost a Deep Thought, Matt. Bravo.

adam kraemer
2.6.02 @ 2:10p

Anyone know where the association between St. Valentine and romantic gifts started? The no research I did on it didn't turn up anything.

russ carr
2.6.02 @ 2:43p

Lazy ass.

St. Valentine loves Adam anyway

adam kraemer
2.6.02 @ 2:58p

I guess the problem is falling into "comparative desuetude." Never want to do that.

mike julianelle
2.6.02 @ 3:00p

That "no research" line is beautiful, Adam.

adam kraemer
2.6.02 @ 3:02p

Thanks. I should have put it in the column.

So what's the most romantic thing you people have ever done/had done for you for V.Day?

adam kraemer
2.6.02 @ 4:42p

Nothing? That's so sad.

jael mchenry
2.6.02 @ 4:52p

You might want to give the world more than 100 minutes to come up with something. Some of us have jobs.

I did like the stuffed elephant I got from Chris Weinkopf circa V-Day 1994, tho. (Know what makes that romantic? Low standards.)

adam kraemer
2.6.02 @ 4:58p

Yeah, but I seem to recall that's also why you were with him.

russ carr
2.6.02 @ 5:09p

Back in singles days, a flirt-friend/work colleague and I used to compete to see who could out-tacky the other with objects of affection. My personal best was giving her a "bondage Barney" (yes, the dinosaur) that I'd decorated.

adam kraemer
2.6.02 @ 5:24p

There's just something very wrong and warped about that, Russ. I love it.

matt morin
2.6.02 @ 7:11p

I think that's illegal in eight midwestern states.

adam kraemer
2.6.02 @ 10:02p

Interestingly, I think if pressed, I could actually name 8 midwestern states. Worship me.

matt morin
2.6.02 @ 10:40p

You da man, Adam. You da man.

jason siciliano
2.7.02 @ 1:49a

Adam - I once received a single red rose from a co-worker, a woman I hardly knew. I thought it the most incredibly romantic thing, until I discovered she'd given one to every guy in the office. Then I realized she was just a tramp.

tracey kelley
2.7.02 @ 9:15a

Did: wrote a silly poem that won an alternative mag contest, netting me and the boy a posh dinner, tickets to a comedy club and drinks at a cool bar.

Got: A handwrittenletter declaring love and lasting adoration. Yep. That's the one I married.

adam kraemer
2.7.02 @ 9:40a

I was actually once broken up with about a week before Valentine's Day, but my girlfriend at the time had already gotten my gift, so I now have this cute, but meaningless little bear sitting on the windowsill of my old bedroom. It would have been quite a nice gift, too. I'm still not sure I won't give it to someone else one of these years.

tracey kelley
2.7.02 @ 9:56a

Take it to a children's hospital instead. Someone there will appreciate it more.

adam kraemer
2.7.02 @ 9:57a

They have hospitals for children?

mike julianelle
2.7.02 @ 10:00a

Or just eviscerate it.

adam kraemer
2.7.02 @ 10:01a

That might be more fun. Or I could eviscerate it in front of the kiddies. Teach them a thing or two.

mike julianelle
2.7.02 @ 10:11a

Just when I think I have you pegged, Adam, you bounce back. Good thinking!

adam kraemer
2.7.02 @ 11:01a

Thanks. Perhaps I could even show them how little a Valentine's Day heart actually resembles a human heart.

mike julianelle
2.7.02 @ 11:08a

And then you can eat it, to demonstrate the pitfalls of real life.

adam kraemer
2.7.02 @ 11:23a

Even better: I can have a really attractive girl eat it.

This might also get the kids interested in watching "Survivor."

mike julianelle
2.7.02 @ 11:34a

Plus, before you have her eat it, you can sprinkle some spices on it, complete with a BAM!!, and that way you can get them into Survivor AND Emeril! And emotional pain.

adam kraemer
2.7.02 @ 12:06p

Actually, I think Emeril's sitcom was enough emotional pain for anyone.

Have I mentioned yet the really hot girl who was kissing me at the bar on Friday only to leave with some other guy?

matt morin
2.7.02 @ 1:18p

Adam, you forgot to mention that the "hot girl" was his mom and the "other guy" was his father.

adam kraemer
2.7.02 @ 1:55p

Matt, you forgot to continue writing in the same person.

And there was nothing (well hardly anything) oedipal going on. Though the girl did leave with my dad. Actually, a few of my friends have taken to singing "Dreams of Adam's mother naked" to the tune of "Californication." I don't particularly approve.

mike julianelle
2.7.02 @ 1:59p

Wow, Matt's post is confusing. So, Adam, pictures?

matt morin
2.7.02 @ 2:05p

Whoops. Maybe I should reread my entire post after changing part of it.

So Adam, you never did tell us the story behind your above post. Was the "other guy" Brad Pitt?

adam kraemer
2.7.02 @ 2:08p

No, actually. What happened was I was hanging out with a group of friends, and this girl was a friend of a friend. Long story short, we all went to a second bar, where I saw her talking to some other guy. I walked up, he introduced himself, and I said, "You look like a music producer," to which he surprisingly responded that he was, and showed me a card to prove it. I was well on my way to not being able to form coherent sentences by then, so when the two of them took off together (after another kiss on my cheek from her), I spilled my beer and left.

What have I learned from all this? Be soberer the next time I see this girl.

adam kraemer
2.7.02 @ 2:10p

On the other hand, I did something I've never done before: I told her point blank that I didn't want to be her friend. I explained that I already know too many women with whom a relationship (or 'other') was cut short by becoming friends. So I just told her up front, "I don't want to be your friend that you complain about other guys to." That's what led to the original kissing.

adam kraemer
2.7.02 @ 2:12p

Oh, I should have read back further. Mike - pictures of this girl or of my mom? Please say "the girl."

matt morin
2.7.02 @ 2:31p

I think Mike already has pictures of your mom. And Mike, if you don't, I'll send you some for a small fee.

adam kraemer
2.7.02 @ 2:46p

I'm not sure if I should be insulted that you're only charging a small fee.

mike julianelle
2.7.02 @ 2:53p

At Adam's request: the girl.

But we all know the truth.

adam kraemer
2.7.02 @ 3:02p

Well, in that case, not yet. Maybe after this weekend.

mike julianelle
2.7.02 @ 3:40p

Don't come back without them! Go for the gold, Lemonde!

adam kraemer
2.7.02 @ 3:57p

Well, we'll see. She is the best looking girl who's been even sorta into me in a while. Though her friends tell me she's got issues, which isn't necessarily a bad thing.

matt morin
2.7.02 @ 4:08p

Issues are always a bad thing.

Then again, what single person our age doesn't have issues? (I mean, beside myself of course.)

But it is better to know the issues going in, than to be blindsided by them down the road.

mike julianelle
2.7.02 @ 4:22p

Okay, sounds good, although this is getting very Penthouse Forum-ish. Best bet: next time you see her, yell something like "I OWN YOU!" as you run towards her with a net.

matt morin
2.7.02 @ 4:31p

Or, regardless of who she's with, just walk right up, don't say a word, and plant a world-rocking kiss on her.

Then simply turn and walk away.

adam kraemer
2.7.02 @ 4:54p

All things considered, I think I like Matt's suggestion better.

roger striffler
2.7.02 @ 5:28p

Wow, this is like an Intrepid conference call....

matt morin
2.7.02 @ 5:44p

Yeah, leave it to the three single guys to go back and forth about how to pick up chicks.

When you think about it, none of us have a leg to stand on.

adam kraemer
2.7.02 @ 5:49p

Why do you think I'm so comfortable being a hypocrite? I'm the Intrepid Media relationship writer who isn't in a relationship. Go figure.

tim lockwood
2.8.02 @ 12:02a

Handwritten notes/letters: The winner, because the handwriting itself subconsciously tells you whether a person is lying or not. Plus, when you read an e-mail, you can't see where a person backspaced over a thought, but with a handwritten note, you can. It's those little things that give you more of an insight into the person with whom you correspond.

Interestingly enough, I am working on a series of articles that have something to do with some personal letters I came across recently. I am having a little difficulty with it, if only because you can't transcribe with the keyboard what you see and feel by looking at a piece of paper that another human actually touched and to which he or she committed their deepest feelings.

michelle von euw
2.8.02 @ 1:22p

A long time ago, Russ wrote: Nothing says "I love you," more than a subscription to The Sporting News.

And that is exactly what I got my husband for V-Day.

adam kraemer
2.8.02 @ 1:43p

As a not huge sports fan, I think I'd have to wonder how well my girlfriend/wife knew me if I received a subscription.

matt morin
2.8.02 @ 1:47p

Michelle, I've asked you this once before, but will you marry me?

russ carr
2.8.02 @ 2:14p

Gosh, Michelle...I think I love you, too. Not because I want a subscription to my own magazine. But because you remembered something I mentioned casually two days ago and realized that it was a good idea.

Oh..and you bought a subscription to my magazine!

adam kraemer
2.8.02 @ 3:53p

Okay. I dare any of you to buy subscriptions to any of the publications I edit on a daily basis.

lee anne ramsey
2.11.02 @ 3:32a

This makes me think of an event from my college days: a good guy friend of mine and I did the whole "if we don't have dates for valentines day we'll have a date with each other" thing, in order to make sure that we would both - at very least - go bowling and drink some bud and have a fun time on the dreaded holiday.

Turns out, due to reasons that I no longer fully remember, I got in a HUGE argument with a different good friend of mine on that day and ended up bailing so that I could patch things up (known in my circle as the "st. valentines daily massacre" - don't know if Jael remembers that, but she does have a partial role in the story).

Long story... short?... I always think of the guy who I bailed on for the bowling date on Valentines Day some time in the early 1990s - which is sort of bizarre, but I guess the moral of the story is: valentines day doesn't have to be about romantic love. Sometimes it's about appreciating the love in your life - whether it be friendship love or lover love.

lee anne ramsey
2.11.02 @ 3:34a

Just thought I needed to break up this single male bonding fest.

BTW, on a completely separate note, last night I watched a rerun in my new zealand hotel room of The Bionic Woman.

adam kraemer
2.11.02 @ 8:24a

Hold on, Lee Anne, is that supposed to be a good Valentine's story or a bad Valentine's story?

jael mchenry
2.11.02 @ 9:00a

Ooh -- here's something I don't recall. Lee Anne, was I involved through TUTV or through Sheinkin? I'm always up for being reminded of things... almost always.

And you're just infinitely cooler than I am. New Zealand. Damn.

sarah ficke
2.11.02 @ 10:09a

valentines day doesn't have to be about romantic love. Sometimes it's about appreciating the love in your life - whether it be friendship love or lover love.

I agree. Conversely, what it shouldn't be about is agreeing to a date just because you are desperate or bored. I tried that last year, and the card and dinner weren't enough to make up for the emotional drama that followed.

adam kraemer
2.11.02 @ 10:27a

My current Valentine's Day plans are go home from work and make a big bowl of pasta to eat while watching something on TV. If these plans change, you people will be the first to know. (The problem with getting my paycheck on the 15th.)

sarah ficke
2.11.02 @ 10:37a

I think most people are officially moving Valentine's Day to Saturday so they don't have to plan around their work schedules.

adam kraemer
2.11.02 @ 10:41a

I want to move mine to Friday, if that's okay with everyone.

lee anne ramsey
2.12.02 @ 4:27a

Adam, I think it's a little bit good and a little bit bad.

You should have Valentine's Day with your Cute Boyfriend (or Cute Girlfriend, whichever applies) whenever you feel like it. I'm going with that theory, of course, because on the 14th I will still be in New Zealand because it won't stop raining.

lee anne ramsey
2.12.02 @ 4:29a

Psst Jael - The key to the story is in the title: st. valentine's DAILY massacre.

And we all know there is no way I could ever be cooler than you are.

adam kraemer
2.12.02 @ 9:55a

Actually, I have no idea what I'm doing Friday, but since I don't get paid 'til then, my Thursday night is likely to be uneventful.

jael mchenry
2.12.02 @ 10:14a

My honey and I were going to cook on Valentine's Day, but because Lent starts tomorrow -- I'm going on the famous Campaign For a Healthier Jael and he's going veggie -- we're feasting tonight instead.

Daily. Ah. Got it.

tracey kelley
2.12.02 @ 2:54p

we're feasting tonight instead.

Being Fat Tuesday and all. :)

adam kraemer
2.12.02 @ 3:06p

Mmmm...pie pants.

jael mchenry
2.12.02 @ 3:22p

Tracey: exactly. It's all about the Gras.

lee anne ramsey
2.12.02 @ 3:56p

Lent is coming up soon? Just in time to re-start all those New Years Resolutions that I forgot about in February!

adam kraemer
2.12.02 @ 5:19p

Isn't it still February?

lee anne ramsey
2.12.02 @ 6:46p

Yes, but New Years Resolutions don't usually last a day past January 31st for me.

adam kraemer
2.12.02 @ 7:14p

I'm impressed that you make it that far. Mine usually last 'til the next weekend.

lee anne ramsey
2.12.02 @ 10:36p

New Years Resolution was to give up french fries. Not easy.

jael mchenry
2.13.02 @ 8:55a

I never make New Year's Resolutions, but have done something every Lent for about 10 years. I think the difference is the forty days thing. If you try you can give up just about anything for that long -- I've done fried foods, chocolate, soda, coffee, cheese, and/or desserts (in various combinations.) Had a serious debate with a friend over whether Lent or year-round Judaism is a more difficult dietary restriction.

adam kraemer
2.13.02 @ 9:22a

Well, in so far as Judaism isn't a dietary restriction....

But I know what you mean. I think not being able to mix milk and meat is pretty tough (no turkey and cheese sandwiches), as is the whole avoidance of shellfish.

I have a friend who regularly gives up Lent for Lent.

adam kraemer
2.14.02 @ 2:12p

By the way, now that it is Valentine's Day, I'm thinking I was right the first time. It sucks.

sarah ficke
2.14.02 @ 3:43p

I think the only reason I noticed it was Valentine's Day is because someone handed me a heart-shaped box of chocolates. After all, the decorations have been up for a month or more now. It's a good thing I gave up giving up chocolate for Lent.

michelle von euw
2.14.02 @ 3:52p

I just made dinner reservations at the Naked Fish. I think everyone should spend Valentine's Day at place with the word "naked" in the title.

adam kraemer
2.14.02 @ 4:03p

That's why I'm going to naked my house.

adam kraemer
2.14.02 @ 5:14p

In case anyone didn't already know, Feb. 15 has recently become known as RU 486 Day. Learn it, love it, but try not to live it.

lee anne ramsey
2.15.02 @ 2:52a

I was going to post this in Michelle's TV article, but realized it belonged here.

Temptation Island 2 - series finale on Valentines Day? I am so sure that show is getting high ratings from all the "Anti Valentine's Day" parties. Could it be less romantic?

adam kraemer
2.15.02 @ 10:28a

Sure. Everyone on it could look like my 11th Grade English teacher. Including the guys.

Or they could add a Fear Factor factor to it all, and have everyone wear leeches in their bathing suits.

I think both of those suggestions would make it less romantic.

russ carr
2.15.02 @ 3:44p

VDay: The last word...

adam kraemer
2.15.02 @ 3:55p

Wow. That just brought a tear to my eye.

mike julianelle
2.15.02 @ 4:02p

Yup. The Onion rules.

adam kraemer
2.15.02 @ 5:13p

I was particularly impressed by the t-shirt they had available last year which read "I ¢¾ Fisting." Now there's a Valentine's Day message for ya.

adam kraemer
2.15.02 @ 5:14p

Dammit. That was supposed to be a heart.

adam kraemer
2.14.06 @ 6:53p

Just wanted to bump this for the day.
I know. Cheap theatrics.

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